


Primadonna Boy

by Andrea250



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ
Genre: Angst, Bottom Shim Changmin, Businessman Jung Yunho, Homin - Freeform, How do I even tag?, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Minor Lee Donghae/Lee Hyukjae | Eunhyuk, Model Shim Changmin, No Smut, One Shot, Top Jung Yunho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-01
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-30 05:59:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18309593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andrea250/pseuds/Andrea250
Summary: "...All I ever wanted was the world, I can't help that I need it all." Changmin looked at the older male with his doe eyes."---But with you Yunho... It is different." Changmin was never good with his feeling or his affections.Rated M for Depression and BxB themed.





	Primadonna Boy

 

**[Song: Primadonna Girl By Marina ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gj5L9SYhoSE&index=2&list=OLAK5uy_mJ5TNN8PmkMmDpI9emDYjL94tPY7Ao2Wc) **

**(This song inspired the title and idea.)**

 

**(Listen to either one. Or all three these songs are what help me write this and gave me inspiration.)**

**Lastly not all of the story but some of the inner thoughts and dialogue even some of the monologue I used lyrics from songs cuz they fit well with the story a lot. In end at the final A/N, I will be posting what songs I used which is the songs I put on here mainly. Again, majority of the story words is mine and not lyrics from the artist. *Note some lyrics are altered to fit the story and scene but none the less I just wanted to say that.**

**3rd person's P.O.V:**

Changmin knew Yunho could never love someone like himself.

So broken and selfish, it was always hot or cold with the younger male and Yunho could never catch a break and Changmin never knew how to give, only take. It was hard for the younger male to be open and real. Changmin was scared of giving his heart away, it was unfamiliar and foreign for him to be vulnerable in the presence of others, he was not one to give in so easily. 

Yunho, Jung Yunho is his kryptonite and Shim Changmin is only human but would like to seem other wises... He could not possibly resist his hyung.

When Yunho is happy, Changmin 10× more. When Yunho is sad, Changmin heart would break. Yunho emotions ultimately affected Changmin and the younger could never figure it out til now.

He was deep, deep, deeply in love with Jung Yunho but his ego would never allow him to openly admit it. He was never a feeling person or one to give his affections away so easily but around Yunho, it is hard to keep a poker face with a blinding smile like Yunho. 

Changmin adored the older male but would never admit to it....

***

Changmin did what he only knows best and that is screwing up, it was his trademark in a way and some how his hyung never raised his voice or lashed out at the younger male and that always amazed Changmin. He aspired to be a person like Yunho but he pointed out his own shortcomings and flaws. 

"Yun... why do you love me?" Changmin whispered to himself in the dead of night as the older male had wrapped Changmin in his forgiving embrace. 

"You don't deserve this, a person like me does not deserve you." Changmin could only be himself at night. 

When the prying eyes of a world that only despised him looked away, it was something that Changmin looked forward to was these little moments. Hidden away in the older male safety, it felt like home, Yunho felt like home!

Changmin loves the flair for dramatics, the validation, the attention, and fame. Even in his shy nature Changmin knew how to play the role that everyone assumed him to be. A whore, gold digger, drama queen, heartless, beautiful stranger, and the list went on... mainly bad but when it was good, it only meant bad, people wanted something from him and that is sex. 

When he met Yunho, it felt like a god sent, Changmin did not know some one like the older male existed and his heart flew at the comforting words that Yunho spoke to him. No malicious intent or seductive stare, it was innocent and sincere and Changmin felt human for the first time, it seemed like a huge cliche but to him, it was relief. 

Yunho saw Changmin at big investor party, it was an important event for not only himself but his company that he built from the bottom up, it was his event and one he felt proud of, he was a part of the big leagues and sought after man, it was his shinning moment. He made it onto the list of top richest men in South Korea and even was on the cover of GQ Korea and on other high claimed magazines, even men health. 

_***flashb** _ _**ack*** _

_** 3yrs ago: ** _

_"_ _Yunho_ _-ah, this is amazing."_ _Donghae_ _patted his best friend on the back._

_"Thank you_ _Hae_ _, it means a lot that you came even in your packed schedule."_ _Donghae_ _always has_ _Yunho's_ _back and vice versa._

_"I saw you brought_ _Eunhyuk_ _-_ _ssi_ _, nice to see you as well."_ _Yunho_ _admired and envied the_ _EunHae_ _couple._

_"Hello_ _Yunho_ _-_ _ssi_ _thank you for your hospitality." They weren't awkward nor friendly with each other, they just did not mind each other, a silent understanding, one would say. The thing that they shared in common was_ _Donghae_ _(_ _Yunho's_ _best friends and_ _Eunhyuk's_ _lover) and their love for dancing._

_If his life was not planned out like a road map for the older male, he would have followed his dreams of owning his own dance studio or being a professional dancer. Than again, that life was just a dream as he knew that was just a fleeting hopeless dream ever since the accident that made him afraid to dance again._

_"You are welcome anything for friends, I wouldn't want it any other way. This event is special and I need my people."_ _Yunho_ _sincerity not gone missing and both males smiled graciously at_ _Yunho_ _caring words._

_"We will catch up in a little but for now we will take our seats as you have more guest coming in CEO Jung."_ _Donghae_ _tease his friend about his new status and also proud of_ _Yunho's_ _achievements._

_Yunho_ _nod his head to both males and went to greet guest as people came into the beautiful venue as his studio apartment would not have been a good setting for such a lavishing and huge occasion. As he kept greeting and smiling at his guest, he saw his frenemy Choi_ _Siwon_ _and he of course did not come alone, it was well know that the handsome male did not have trouble in the ladies department._

_What was different was the fact his plus one was not a women but a very beautiful man and_ _Yunho_ _could not turn away from him, that is until_ _Siwon_ _opened his mouth and the misty haze of  the doe eyed man is gone._

_Changmin_ _is filled with grace and beauty and these terms are not associated with a man but with_ _Changmin_ _, it just seemed to be appropriate._

_Yunho_ _did not know what compelled him to want to be close to the other male but something in his heart called out, no, screamed at him to be by his side, it was not a want but a need._ _Changmin_ _is beautiful and handsome but looks are vain. He saw a glint of loneliness and distraught within the eyes of an angel._

_Yunho_ _wanted to make sure that_ _Changmin_ _never had to feel that way ever again._

_He was brought back to life by_ _Heechul_ _slapping his head._

_"Yah Jung_ _Yunho_ _!" He playfully hits_ _Yunho_ _arm._

_"Stop undressing that_ _Changmin_ _guy with your eyes!" He shouted and_ _Yunho_ _covered the older mouth making sure he does not utter another word._

_"Shut up!"_ _Yunho_ _hisses and gives the incoming guest a smile._

_"_ _Ewww_ _."_ _Yunho_ _pulled his hand back and wiped it._

_"Well... if someone had payed attention we would not have to be childish."_ _Heechul_ _chuckles._

_"You are just childish_ _Heechul_ _." He retorts back and_ _Heechul_ _laughs in agreement._

_"How do you know_ _Changmin_ _?"_ _Yunho_ _asked his dear friend._

_"Stay away from him, let's just say he has a reputation and I don't want you caught up in the likes of him. Got it!" He pat_ _Yunho_ _on the back and walked away._

_"That did not help at all." He muttered to himself._

**_ *End of Flashback* _ **

Yunho's heart clenched at his lover sorrowful tone, it killed him hearing the way Changmin spoke about himself.

Every night Yunho would pretend to be asleep to hear Changmin speak without fear or hesitant. He wish how he could take away the doubt and sorrow, kiss the tears away and hold him in his vulnerable state. But he did not want to make Changmin feel weak or small cuz past events Changmin would lash out at him.

"I am sorry for being so cruel to you Yunho." He could hear Changmin heartbreak just a little bit more.

"You could have been happy with her and your family loves her. I am just a good for nothing slut Yunho." Yunho really hated when Changmin would speak less of himself.

**_*Flashback*_**  

**_ 1 yr ago _ **

_Yunho_ _lived for approval of his family, friends, and everyone around him but he tried not to show just how deeply he was affected by others opinions, it never went well for the older male as his biggest critic is initially himself. His insecurities and fears kept him from what he wanted so he knew how to play it safe but the passion that blazed in his eyes never exhaust or faded._

_"_ _Hyung_ _, you know they don't like me and they never will!"_ _Changmin_ _pouted._

_"Oh my bambi, they will love you cuz you are my choice. They will come around and I know for sure, it doesn't matter what they say now. They don't know you, the real you."_ _Yunho_ _pulled_ _Changmin_ _into a kiss and the younger male felt sparks burst in his being._

_Changmin_ _is in love but it scared him just how much he truly loves the older male._

_"I wanna be with only you Shim. Don't try to runaway from me."_ _Changmin_ _did not want to admit how much he loved hearing_ _Yunho_ _speak words of love._

_"Ssh you grease ball!"_ _Changmin_ _kissed_ _Yunho_ _._

_"You know you love it!"_ _Yunho_ _started to tickle_ _Changmin_ _._

_***_

_"Why do you insist on being with a child_ _Yunho_ _?" His mother hissed in_ _Yunho's_ _ear._

_"Please be nice." He kissed his mothers cheek._

_"I just think this is a bad idea."_ _he_ _knew that_ _Changmin_ _could hear them as the other male is standing next to them._

_"Mother, I beg of you to stop now!" He bowed and intertwined his fingers with_ _changmin's_ _._

_"We are going to head to the back yard to get some air."_ _Yunho_ _felt like he let_ _Changmin_ _down._

_Yunho_ _lived for approval of his family, friends, and everyone around him but he tried not to show just how deeply he was affected by others opinions, it never went well for the older male as his biggest critic is initially himself._

_His insecurities and fears kept him from what he wanted, so he knew how to play it safe but the passion that blazed in his eyes never exhaust or faded._

_Once they get to the back_ _Changmin_ _gives_ _Yunho_ _a hug._

_"I know how much your mother's opinions means too you. I respect you and your mother cuz of how important she is too you."_ _Yunho_ _hated that he could never protect the things he want and the things that make him happy._

_He is a coward cuz he is always letting_ _Changmin_ _get hurt by his mother poisonous words._ _Changmin_ _never complained or said anything about his mother's darkly intent against him but_ _Yunho_ _never bothered to ask or speak to_ _Changmin_ _about this._

_Yunho_ _knows that the rest of his family has no bad feelings against his lover,_ _it is only his mother and his father does not mind_ _Changmin_ _but he tells_ _him_ _to keep the doe eyed boy as a dirty little secret. That_ _Changmin_ _is not fit to stand next to_ _Yunho_ _._

_"I am sorry."_ _Yunho_ _felt like a sorry was not enough._

_"Yun, don't be-"_ _Yunho_ _did not allow him to finish._

_"_ _Changmin_ _, I am in love with you but my actions do not match it. I am a horrible boyfriend."_ _Yunho_ _did not feel worthy of_ _changmin_ _._

_"You idiot, I know you love me and I love you too."_ _Changmin_ _flustered by his own words._

_"So, you love me huh?"_ _Yunho_ _teased._

_"Oh my_ _Yunho_ _, I hate you so much."_ _Changmin_ _pretended to be mad._

_"You love me!"_ _Yunho_ _would choose_ _Changmin_ _in any lifetime, it doesn't matter as long as_ _Changmin_ _is by his side... that is all he needs._

_"_ _Yunho_ _!"_ _Changmin_ _whined as he felt himself go hot red._

_"Okay, my deer."_ _Changmin_ _truly loves this idiot._

_They held each other in the_ _starry_ _night and in that moment everything seemed perfect to the imperfect them, it's like magic,_ _Yunho_ _felt like he could do anything impossible cuz the doe eyed male is beside him._

_Yunho_ _wants to be selfish this once and he didn't care about anyone else's say._ _Yunho_ _could not loose_ _Changmin_ _cuz of his need for validation, he made a promise to protect and be next to_ _changmin_ _, it was certain that_ _Changmin_ _is the one that would not only be his partner but his equal._

_"Promise me, no matter how hard things get or if I am being hard or uneasy, promise you will not leave."_ _Changmin_ _would never leave his _ _Yunho's_ _side ever._

**_ *Flashback ends* _ **

He pulled Changmin closer posing as just cuddling in his sleep, which Changmin had no objections. Changmin felt less sad in the older male calming and even breath and Changmin wanted this to be forever, these moments reminded him that with Yunho... He doesn't have to be alone again.

He intends to keep that promise of never leaving Changmin cuz Yunho needs him, it is the only way he could live happily, his reason to smile.

"Please Hyung, don't leave me. I can't do this, I am weak and selfish. I have lost everything else!" Changmin sound so broken and lost.

'You have my heart.' Yunho thought to himself.

"I am sorry." Changmin curled into himself. Yunho could hear Changmin heart break and he tried not to comfort Changmin.

"Chami... are you okay?" He pretend to be waking up.

"Yeah, go back too sleep Yunho." Changmin voice horsed.

"I love you, you are my forever." Yunho had too.

Changmin wondered if Yunho heard his sorrow late night monologues or if he could read his mind?

"I really needed to hear that." Changmin blurted out and Yunho started to kiss Changmin shoulder blades, his neck, and lips.

"Never doubt my love for you, ever, it is not up for question or a lie. Believe in me and know that you are more than what people say." Changmin has a reputation that many would call scandalous.

Changmin had a few fleeting "love" affairs... love is not how he saw it. Changmin never really had sex with any of them just a few hand jobs here and blowjobs there. Some just wanted company, he is not a prostitute, but a high class hook up call.

Yet, people thought differently of him and never bothered to get to know him or see him. They looked through him or down, it saddened him but made him stronger.

This life is not fair or justly, it is a dog-eat-dog world and he learned pretty quickly not to show his weakness.

**_ *Flashback* _ ** ****

**_ 3yrs ago: _ **

_Siwon_ _pulled the car to a complete stop, he oozed confidence and arrogance, it pissed off_ _Changmin_ _just how cocky this man is. But money talks and_ _Changmin_ _pretended to worship the very ground he walked on, it disgusted him._

_Siwon_ _pulled up to the_ _valet and_ _Siwon_ _the gentleman he is, not really, walked ahead and_ _Changmin_ _got out and walked up meeting him at the top step._

_"Ready to go in." He pulled the younger male to his body and they walked into the lovely venue._

_"Hello_ _Yunho_ _-_ _ssi_ _."_ _Siwon_ _smiled towards his oldest and longest frenemy._

_"Hello_ _Siwion_ _-_ _ssi_ _."_ _Yunho_  retorted back just as fake as Siwon.

 _"Who is your lovely guest?"_ Changmin was taken aback by the kindness and respect Yunho showed.

 _"I am Shim_ _Changmin_ _, nice too meet you_ _Yunho_ _-_ _ssi_ _."_ _Changmin_ _bowed politely_   _towards_ _Yunho_ _trying to not show the blush that would soon appear._

_Changmin_ _checked out_ _Yunho_ _from head to toe and he was taken aback the powerful being, reminding_ _Changmin_ _that_ _Yunho_ _looked like a tiger. He oozed confidence just like_ _Siwon_ _but_ _Yunho_ _seemed humble and good, unlike his date._

_"Nice too meet you_ _Changmin_ _-_ _ssi_ _, enjoy the night you both."_ _Changmin_ _was grateful cuz he would have done something unlike himself_ _in front_ _of these money-hungry bastards. He did not want to_ _embarrass_ _Yunho_ _as he is the only one that does not look at him in contempt or lust._

_Siwon_ _grasped at_ _Changmin_ _waist and pulled_ _Changmin_ _harshly off into the rows of people that stared at_ _Siwon_ _and_ _Changmin_ _but mainly at him, but these were not flattering at all or compassion._

_"Don't think I don't know what you are doing!"_ _Siwon_ _questioned the younger male, digging his fingers into his waist._

_"I don't understand!" He yelped as_ _Siwon_ _dug harder._

**(A/N: I am sorry for the way I portray** **Siwon** **😭😭😭 I still love my handsome CEO. Lastly his portrayal in this is needed so forgive me fellow E.L.F(s))**

_"I am no fool_ _Changmin_ _... now be a good boy."_ _Changmin_ _felt violated by the older man but he is use too it._

_"Yes, master." Some of these people had weird request when he is with these people._

_As they walked, it was no surprise that majority of these elites were speaking badly of him. Slandering his name and making him seem like nothing more than a penny store hooker but he did not allow them to see him falter._

_He tried to ignore the stares and glares._

**_ *Flashback ends* _ **

"Thank you for accepting me, for me." Changmin loves the older male to the moon and back.

"What I love about you is, you know who you are." Changmin admired that quality in Yunho.

"What I love about you is, you know what you are not." Changmin knew he was never what those vultures said.

At times he is insecure but Yunho knew that Changmin is filled with pride and confidence in himself.

"I am glad I met you that night at your event. You made me feel important and mostly safe, thank you for that." Changmin remembered how all the other guest would speak vulgarly about him and would insult him.

Siwon of course indulging the maniacs and their harsh and despicable comments. Even Siwon calling the young male some unpleasant remarks, he felt cheap and hurt even if he was paid handsomely.

Regardless, he is still human but nobody saw him, except  _his_  Yunho.

_** *Flashback* ** _

_** 5 months ago: ** _

_Changmin_ _came to visit his lovely boyfriend on his break, did he mention that_ _Changmin_ _is a supermodel._

_With his modeling job and extra cash from when people that wanted the pleasure of_ _Changmin's_ _company, no longer in that business, but he is off well. So he could afford to take time off of work and spend it with his lovely boyfriend._

_Walking into the building he could hear the people around him gasp and whisper about him and even feel the uncomfortable glares and stares._

_He is good at showing a poker face even when things get out of hand, it is_ _Changmin's_ _many talents and he like to pride himself on being mysterious and not easy._

_"That is Max_ _Changmin!_ _"_

_"The nerve of that whore strutting like he owns this place."_

_"He is so handsome!"_

_"I wonder what he would look on his knees?"_

_"Poor_ _Ceo_ _Yunho_ _oppa_ _being stuck with a gold digger."_

_"Him and_ _Ceo_ _Yunho_ _hyung_ _look so cute together."_

_That comment made him almost brake into gleeful smile. He just carried on like nothing happened, if though as he just not heard such comments_.

_He did not bother to waste his time on such pitiful people and their rash words. They did not know_ _Changmin_ _or even mattered so why spend another second on them._

_People parted like the red sea when_ _Changmin_ _pass through and on the way to the elevators to the top floor._

_***_   
_The elevator ride to the sixteenth floor is long and boring. He couldn't wait to see_ _Yunho_ _and change his dampen mood to a much more pleasant one._

_He walked through the more private area as_ _Yunho_ _only keeps 12 staff max up here, while the other floors are riddled with hoards of workers._

_None of the workers here had the guts to say anything bad about_ _Changmin_ _as regards to the one and only incident where one of the employees made a repulsive comment about the CEO's boyfriend._

_Which_ _Yunho_ _heard and demoted the worker, cuz instead of firing (he is professional) he just demoted him and gave him a crap load of unnecessary work load. Which_ _Changmin_ _scolded_ _Yunho_ _for doing that cuz he does not like that he affected_ _Yunho's_ _judgment._

_He is just glad he does not have too hear such comments in this office even if it is out of fear, it is just nice. He knew he is hated among_ _Yunho's_ _colleges  except for_ _Yunho's_ _secretary BoA_ _noona_ _._

_She treated_ _Changmin_ _with kindness and respect and they even hang out and do group stuff. Which made_ _Changmin_ _happy that he made a friend and that she like him instead of judging and making absurd comments._

_"_ _Noona_ _!" He spoke gleefully towards the older women._

_"Hi min!" He usually gets upset at silly nicknames but as long as it is_ _kyuline_ _, BoA, his mother, and his boyfriend. He is completely fine!_

_"Is_ _Yunho_ _busy? I decided to surprise him for a visit."_ _Changmin_ _beamed excitingly._

_"_ _Hojun_ _is in there with_ _Yunho_ _." She said with caution._

_BoA knew how much the tall male despised_ _Yunho's_ _best friend... this got awkward._

_"Beep bop, oh look_ _Yunho_ _is calling!" She made an excuse to remove herself from this situation._

_Changmin_ _is fuming but he refuse to allow this to break his solid mask. He refuse to show his distaste and dare he say jealousy for the older male._

_He sucked in a sharp breathe and walked to the door of_ _Yunho's_ _office._

_He could hear laughing but his heart pounded with a furious rage and he wanted to be upset. But that would make his boyfriend upset and show that_ _Changmin_ _did not trust_ _Yunho_ _._

_In fact he did trust_ _Yunho_ _, it is_ _Hojun_ _he did not trust around his sweet and kind heart_ _hyung_ _._

_He calmly knocked on the door and and did not wait for a response._

_"Oh minnie!"_ _Yunho_ _smile grew bigger._

_Changmin_ _forgot about the elephant in the room..._

_"Hello_ _Changmin_ _-_ _ssi_ _."_ _Hojun_ _said sweetly._

_Souring_ _Changmin_ _mood all over again but he refuse to show that he is upset._

_"Hello Yun and_ _Hojun_ _-_ _ssi_ _." The tone difference between the names._

_"What brings you here, it is a lovely surprise though." The older male had been touched at_ _Changmin's_ _arrival._

_"I just wanted to visit_ **_ my _ ** _boyfriend!" He directed his eyes to_ _Hojun_ _but the male did not notice._

_Yunho_ _could clearly see the hate in the younger male's eyes, it looked like the flames of hell, scary really._

_He got up from his desk and went to give his lover a hug and pull him to where him and_ _Hojun_ _are sitting._

_When_ _Changmin_ _is pulled into the older males embrace he calmed down, it was nice to feel the safety and comfort of his lover and_ _Changmin_ _felt stupid. He should not be acting so crazy!_

_"Play nice_ _Changdol_ _."_ _Yunho_ _whisper into his ear making_ _Changmin_ _shudder and almost moan._

_"I always do!"_ _Changmin_ _purred sweetly._

_Yunho_ _had many ideas but this is his work and he must be "_ _professional_ _" and last time they got caught by an employee and that is how the whole work places found out about their relationship._

_Which in turn cause_ _Changmin_ _much grief cuz of the workers comments and judgement. He hated that people would say such things about his sweet doe eyed boyfriend._

_But as long as he is beside_ _Changmin_ _nobody,_   _ **nobody,**_ _would ever dare to lay a finger or speak so rash about his amazing boyfriend._

_** *Flashback ends* ** _

"Nobody will ever understand, they think I am something that I am not, a Primadonna boy!" Changmin did have a refine taste but he wasn't shallow.

"Diamonds and silk are you though." Yunho joked but Changmin was not in the joking mood.

Everyone says that I'm kinda difficult and it's always my fault, they expect me to misbehave or throw a tantrum." Changmin had face terrible people and the power of status but in the face of adversity... nobody expect Changmin to actually be real. 

So he played the starring role well.

"I know I've got a big ego Yun, but I'm sad to the core." Changmin hated himself and the fake people that surrounded him. So he created a persona that would make him strong, even if it is what everyone claims the supermodel to be.

"I get what I want 'cause I ask for it and not because I'm really that deserving of it." after becoming Max, he started to live as this snobbish and higher-than-thou attitude. 

"As Max, all I ever wanted was the world, I can't help that I need it all." Changmin looked at the older male with his doe eyes.

"Some how, it didn't make sense at first, but with you Yunho... It is different. I don't need blood, guts, and chocolate cake... I felt like I am Changmin." Changmin was never good with his feeling or his affections.

He owes Yunho his life.

_***Flashback*** _

**_2yrs and a half ago:_ **

Changmin knew that at any moment Yunho could just walk out on him and never turn back, it frightened him that someone had so much power over him, it was unfair. 

So, he did what he always does best and tries to drive them away.

He started to disappear on Yunho, come back to their apartment at long hours of the night, come back drunk, throw tantrums, and do outlandish things that would make Yunho leave. 

but alas Yunho never got mad or yelled at him, it was like this man was not real, like at all! Anyone with the right sense of mind would have gotten the hell out of dodge. But Yunho is always caring and patient, a real angle, it made Changmin want to stop his foolish plan. 

***

_Until one day_ _Changmin_ _, stupid silly boy!_

_He almost cheated on the older male... right in front of him too boot. But he could not do it, the way_ _Yunho_ _stared at him in hurt and disappointment, it killed the young male and he knew that it was because of himself._

_All_ _Yunho_ _has done is love_ _Changmin_ _and he just couldn't do it. So he pushed the guy away and ran to out gala event to beg for his forgiveness. Which_ _Changmin_ _did not deserve but he wanted his love to forgive him._

_For his foolish behavior, he really fucked up and he hated himself for it even more._

_He chased him down to the parking garage..._

_"_ _Yunho_ _! Please I am sorry!" He couldn't bare to loose the love of his life._

_"What_ _Changmin_ _, your sorry!"_ _Changmin_ _flinched at_ _Yunho's_ _malicious tone._

_"This is the last straw... I am done_ _Changmin_ _!"_ _Yunho_ _tried to chase away the tears that threaten to cascade down his sullen face._

_"Please don't, it is a mistake!"_ _Changmin_ _pleaded._

_"I have forgiven you for your behavior lately but breaking my heart... you are just cruel Shim."_ _Yunho_ _could not bare the indescribable pain._

_"Please let me explain!" he begged._

_Yunho_ _did not want to hear some stupid excuse. He turned around but_ _Changmin_ _grabbed his hand and dropped to the ground._

_"Please!" His doe eyes made_ _Yunho_ _weak but with tears streaming down his face killed him, nonetheless, he refuse to show any emotion._

_"_ _Yunho_ _, I can't let you go, cuz I am in love with you but I was afraid that you would finally find someone better. Your parents despise me and everyone else basically... you should have been with Go Ara. You both look cute together."_ _Changmin_ _heart kept tearing at the seams._

_"You have this strong hold on me and I was scared like hell, that you would leave like everyone else and so I ran first! you are kind and patient_ _Yunho_ _and I don't deserve you and I will never be worthy!"_ _Changmin_ _sobbed broke_ _Yunho's_ _heart._

_"I thought I could go through with it but I couldn't cuz that thought of hurting you, it hurts like hell and the way you looked at me made my skin crawl and I wanted to shed my skin."_ _Yunho_ _resolve is slowly coming undone._

_"If you leave, I understand but please know that my feelings and affections were never a lie, it was never an act and I m so desperately in love with you. I have never felt that way about anyone!"_ _Changmin_ _laid his heart on the line even if  it meant_ _Yunho_ _rejecting him._

_It is now or never!_

_"I've been a fool and I've been blind, I can never leave the past behind I can see no way, I can see no way... I'm always dragging that horse around but tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground!"_ _Changmin_ _is done with his graceless heart, so tonight he's  gonna cut it out and then restart._

_"I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't_ _Yunho_ _! So here's to drinks in the dark at the end of my road and I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope, it's a shot in the dark and right at my throat!"_ _Changmin_ _was shaking the devil off his back._

_Regrets collect like old friends, here to relive_ _Changmin's_ _darkest moments he can see no way and all of the ghouls come out to play... every demon wants his pound of flesh and_ _Changmin_ _is ready to let go of his fears._

_"Living isn't living when I'm missing you_ _Yunho_ _." The pleading male can't imagine a life without him anymore._

_"Please_ _Yunho_ _! You are the only one I love... I need you in my life!"_ _Yunho_ _wanted to forgive_ _Changmin_ _but he couldn't not in this state!_

_"I need sometime_ _Changmin_ _."_ _Yunho_ _let go fir_ st.

 _Changmin_ _felt dead inside_.

_***_

_** 3 months after the fight ** _

_Changmin_ _is a mess and he felt lost and gone, the tabloids showed_ _Yunho_ _smiling next to her! BoA kept trying to contact the younger male but_ _Changmin_ _ignored the world only leaving his home when work called. After, he would drag his sorry ass home and fall back into a lonely pit._

_He missed_ _Yunho_ _and he couldn't handle the separation but he deserved this nasty fate, the ugliness of being a fool and the pretty lies, the ugly truth could not mend him this time, it was impossible of seeing a way out of this dark tunnel._

_Changmin's_ _got a hole inside of himself , living with identities that do not belong to him... In this life, he has got this far, now he is ready for the last hoorah! Dying like a shooting star, he felt like shit and the throbbing head ache did not help him._

_He wanted to run far away from here and never look back, life seem to bleak without_ _Yunho_ _there by his side and telling him that "not everyday will be a rainy day" he took comfort in his words._

_"Come on_ _Changmin_ _you have an interview today." His manager_ _hyung_ _tried to get him out of bed._

_He hated to see_ _Changmin_ _in such a pitiful state but he knew better than to pry it out of the model, it usually ended up with_ _Changmin_ _being upset and even more pain in his ass! But he cares and loves_ _Changmin_ _like a little brother that his heart broke at the site of the state of the man he once knew._

_"I can't_ _hyung_ _!"_ _changmin_ _cried._  

_"Yes, you can! You are fucking MAX TO THE FUCKING_ _CHANGMIN_ _!" He refuse to give up on_ _Changmin_ _as everyone else even_ _Yunho_ _has done._

_"Afterwards, I promise to bring you back and we can get some food..." He tried to coax him out of his bedroom with the one of few things that made him happy._  

_Changmin's_ _ears perked at the word food but his heart was still in a damaging state that he refused to eat._

_"No!" He just wanted to stay in his pity party and never come out._

_The only person that loves him, beside his family and friends (including his manager), is gone and_ _Changmin_ _did not know how to breathe._

_"Please_ _Changmin_ _! If not for yourself or me... at least for_ _Yunho's_ _sake." He hated using that bastards name._

_"Fine..."_ _Changmin_ _knew that_ _Yunho_ _would have scolded him for such behavior but instead cheered him on and tell him to work hard even when the day is not the best._

***

_"Thank you Max for today shoot and interview can you give our readers any last words?"_

_"Today, the concept is about love..." He tried to keep his composure._  

_"If you're in love, then you are the lucky one... 'cause most of us are bitter over someone, setting fire to our insides for fun. To distract our hearts from ever missing them... I'm forever missing him! I was in love but I ruined it, I killed any hope of happiness and a lifetime of love."_ _Changmin_ _tried not to cry._

_"Being in love is an experience that I could not explain... I messed up everything... so please everyone, if someone is giving you their heart without conditions or limits. Hold on to them and never look back cuz that is rare."_ _Changmin_ _thoughts leading to_ _Yunho_

_He excused himself without ending it properly but he didn't care._

_He just wanted to get the hell out of their before he broke dow_ n. 

_"_ _Hyung_ _! I miss him so much.." He sobbed in his dressing room._

_All he could do is hug and comfort_ _Changmin_ _in his time of need._

_"He moved on_ _hyung_ _... I did not know it could be that easy!" Go_ _Ara's_ _company confirmed their dating rumors and_ _Changmin_ _is gone._

_He didn't want a heart if it meant living in agony. He wiped away his tears and pulled back his facade on and decided that the world is too cruel and cunning for_ _Changmin_ _... So he decided that Max is the real him._

_"_ _Hyung_ _, I need a drink!" He got up and dusted himself off and just smiled._

_He was scared of what just happened with_ _Changmin_ _._

_"Didn't you want to go home?"_ _Changmin_ _did not answer the question._

_***_

_Yunho has been such a mess since that day, it just killed him. Having to turn his back on Changmin but it is for the best that they both part, it just had to end cuz Yunho could not take it anymore and what Changmin did to him... he felt dead._

_He knew Changmin did not actually cheat but the fact that he almost did is what hurt him the most and he tried to push the thought away and go back to Changmin but it just stung to bad and his pride just would not allow him to make such decisions._

_Changmin's confession broke him and he could understand why Changmin did. All of his life he pretended to be some he is not and people kept abandoning him and the young model was left all alone, it did not truly justify the means but Yunho did not completely blame him._

_Changmin heart is guarded and Yunho gave his affections so freely probably scared his boyfriend and made him spiral, especially with the way his parents treated Changmin and the staff at his company._

_He knew the gossip and slander and people were disciplined greatly for such things and Yunho is furious but Changmin hated that Yunho would do that, he would always tell him that "people have the right to their opinions but it does not make it true. Only the people that mattered to  me the most opinions matter." and Yunho was always surprised at the maturity Changmin possessed._

_"Yunho!" BoA slammed on his office door._

_She is pissed!_

_"I get what happened but Changmin is also suffering." BoA protected Changmin with fury as a lot of their colleges are assholes, so she became mother bear to Changmin in a way._

_"You are suppose to be on my side." Yunho joked._

_"You did a dick move Yunho! You should have at least given Changmin an explanation or a proper ending." Yunho refused to believe it was his fault._

_"You just left without and never called. I got off the phone with his manager and he said that Changmin is not doing well, it is serious!" BoA kept yelling at him._

_BoA and him have been friends since forever and if it was anyone else yelling at him like a delinquent, well they would have paid for such things._

_She kept going on and Yunho felt his patience run thin and he was upset cuz Changmin was not so innocent in their ending but he refused to see reason._

_"BoA. I was destroyed! I have been such a mess  and I'm feeling lost without him. I refuse to sleep in our empty bed where I'm all alone, I've been such a mess BoA! I need a one way ticket anywhere he is.... is where I want to go."_   _Yunho heart begged for Changmin._

_"When he is not with me, these days are boring! Wish it were easy like Sunday morning, when I'd be waking up with him and only doing those things we wanna do. My heart is anywhere he goes and when I'm next to him I'm home." Yunho sobbed._

_"I was hurt that night too and it took a lot for me too turn away from him and try to save my heart. I get how much you care about him but at least see it from my end too. I am far from fine BoA and I wish he was next to me." Yunho is falling apart._

_"Sweetie, I am so sorry." BoA went to hold the shattered man._

_"Go too him or move on." BoA said softly but Yunho is torn between her suggestion._

_***_

_"Hi Ara, it is nice to meet again." She is a good friend to Yunho as well but he also knew the feelings that she harbored for him._

_"Hi Yunho!" She looked at him with a soft and knowing smile._

_It had been four months since the fight and Yunho tried to rebuilt himself but after seeing Changmin's interview broke him yet again._

_"If you're in love, then you are the lucky one... 'cause most of us are bitter over someone, setting fire to our insides for fun. To distract our hearts from ever missing them... I'm forever missing him! I was in love but I ruined it, I killed any hope of happiness and a lifetime of love." Yunho heart broke for Changmin and himself. He could hear the sorrow and pain._

_"Being in love is an experience that I could not explain... I messed up everything... so please everyone, if someone is giving you their heart without conditions or limits. Hold on to them and never look back cuz that is rare." Yunho wanted to run back to him._

_"Yunho."he heard his name being called._

_"Yunho, earth too Yun!" She shouted, ignoring the nickname as Changmin always called him so fondly._

_"I know you miss him but it is time to let go." She grabbed his hand._

_"I think it is best for you to finally move on... maybe with me?" Ara tried to hide the hope in her eyes and Yunho knew._

_"We could make my companies claims actually true... and you can start healing." She tried to reason and Yunho wanted to let her down gently._

_Yunho saw those and he was upset at first but his non-rational side thought maybe this was the right move and to leave it as is. But he knew that it was the wrong move but he was hoping that Changmin would come back or something. He was hoping his ex-lover would make a move but that never happened._

_He sighed "Okay." he tried to smile._

_She was over the moon and Yunho was not happy but he wanted to be. So, he tried to reason that he should be happy too but his heart felt betrayed all over again and so what came next shocked him and her._

_"But you will never be Changmin and I can never love you as I did him." She sat back in her chair at the cafe they are currently located at the corner of  his company building._

_She tried to visit a lot and make him go out to places with her and as much as he appreciated the gesture... his heart only yearned for him._

_"I understand but I can try too." She looked at him seductively but he could only see Changmin._

_***_

**_ 6 months later _ **

_Changmin_ _was never the same, he became more reckless and bold (not in a good way), he kept putting up a strong front and staying out til the next day or be gone for weeks on end, it has been getting bad. Sometimes he would come back with bruises on his wrist and marks on his body._

_He would pretend to be alright, he would pop up on tabloids for various reasons and not in good ways, it broke his_ _hyung's_ _heart to see_ _Changmin_ _so low, it was his job to ensure_ _Changmin's_ _well being._

_Changmin_ _, was out yet again and he was wasted out of his mind! He did the best thing for_ _Changmin_ _._

_"Hello?" the voice on the other end replied._

_"Please help me save him!" his voice defeated._

_"_ _Changmin_ _is not in a good place and I am afraid... he will die." the other line went deadly silent._

_"Okay, I will be there!" he hung up._

_He just hoped that_ _Changmin_ _will get better. He could not forgive himself if_ _Changmin_ _died and he did nothing but watch._

_***_

_Yunho felt some what ready to move on and Ara has been a real big help in that department, she was always cheering him up and loving him the way he deserved and he is grateful for the good days they spent together._

_Some days are not the best and he is just back to where  he was after Changmin and his parting. But his mind refuse to go back and so instead he just feels mixed emotions and sometimes numb or even nothing at all..._

_Like today, it felt off and lonely even with her here and he just could not explain the feeling. They are in his office and she is visiting during his lunch break and he is suppose to be happy... right? _

_"Are we still on for movie night right?" She acted shyly ._

_"Yes!" Yunho tried to down his salad but his mind was reeling and his heart felt out of place._

_"Yunho!" BoA shouted and ran into the room without knocking._

_"What is it BoA?" He saw the distress written across her face._

_"Changmin manager is calling." He wanted to deny it and tell her to just ignore it... but he never calls, it is usually him using BoA phone cuz the manager blocked his number._

_"Give me the phone." She answers the call._

_"Hello?" He spoke first._

_"Please help me save him!" Manager hyung voice sounded defeated._

_"_ _Changmin_ _is not in a good place and I am afraid... he will die." Yunho felt his heart crash._

_"Okay, I will be there!" Yunho hung up._

_He screamed and felt at fault, he saw the tabloids and heard gossip of the young model now and even his manager told him partially the truth. But he thought nothing of it cuz he was trying to move on but he never did._

_His life is incomplete and that is because it's missing Changmin! He never moved on but numbed his heart by trying to replace Changmin. As  Another day passed today, nothing different changed for him... his heart still cried out but he just refused to listen._

_He thought he couldn't live without Chanming but this is his life now but he felt empty,  Yunho is still back at the start, still at that place where Changmin existed. He let it all out so he could feel relieved but it's alright to care about what happened in the past... what events took place too lead him here now and how he is affected._

_When Yunho thinks he can see the answer too his troubles and longing heart... sometimes, it becomes a prison that traps him cuz he is back to the drawing board and trying to figure out where to begin. Time only goes forward and Yunho has done nothing, only avoiding the fact that Changmin is still in his heart._

_"Yunho, stop!" Ara shouted as he was destroying his own office. He felt sorry for scaring BoA and Ara as they look at him in fear and concern._

_"I am missing him and another day passed  and  again_ I am missing him and another, it feels like a year passed... this is how I live, as I long for only him." He cries. 

"I try telling myself that I'll be alright and this will pass  but at the end of the day, it's him again! My heart still wants Changmin, even if years pass, I still miss him." Yunho admitted with conviction.

"I still remember when I first saw him and I still remember what he wore even how his hair looked." His heart beating fast as he remembers every detail of Changmin and the way he spoke to Yunho's heart.  
  


"He is still in my heart, Like tangled hair after he gets up...my days have become a mess too, this is on Changmin for hurting me and his confession. I try to act like I'm fine but my depressed face and his traces that are everywhere, that's all on him!" He couldn't get Changmin out of his mind, no matter how hard he tried.

"I still can't forget him, I want him to come back to me even if we'll have the same ending again! I would do it all over in a heartbeat cuz I love him and he loved me and that is what I want! I am missing him today and the day before that even the week... I have missed him since our parting." He confessed.

"I am missing him so bad that another year passed in my heart and as I long for him... I am sorry."he finally looked up at both women. 

"I am sorry Ara, I thought I was ready to move on and love you but I never was and I am sorry for that!" Yunho felt like complete shit. 

"I am not mad, it isn't your fault but I pushed it on you and I tried to replace Changmin and I should have realized that I could never fill that place in your heart." Ara smiled at him but her heart broke and she could not blame Yunho for it. 

"Go to him! Fight for him and never let go Yunho." She kissed him and left. 

"I will fix the  office, you go and get your man!" BoA waved him off. 

"Thank you!" Yunho runs out of his office at light speed.

**_ Later that night.  _ **

_There was a knock on_ _Changmin's_ _apartment door, of course only manager_ _hyung_ _is there waiting for the arrival of his_ _dongsaeng_ _. He got up to open the door for his guest that he invited to help_ _Changmin_ _._

_"Thank you for coming_ _Yunho_ _-_ _ssi_ _." he had no other options._

_"Thank you for calling."_ _Yunho_ _of course saw the news papers and_ _sns_ _even called_ _Changmin_ _manager for updates once in a while but all there was- is tragedy._

_"I know this is out of the blue and you have your own life..."  He started to burst into tears as he speaks to_ _Yunho_ _._

_"Don't worry..."_ _Yunho_ _still loves_ _Changmin_ _and he never stopped._

_Dating Go Ara was to make him forget and  to just move on from his love. He is a bad person for using her but he did tell her that he was still in love with the one and only Shim_ _Changmin_ _. She accepted that fact and tried to replace the supermodel from_ _Yunho's_ _heart. Nonetheless, he hurt one of his most cherished friends and for that he is sorry to Ara for using her and being selfish._

_"I don't know if I can save him_ _Yunho_ _-_ _ssi_ _, he keeps pulling away. Saying that_ _Changmin_ _is dead and saying that he is Max now."_ _Yunho_ _did not know just how bad it got._

_"I am in a losing fight." he sobbed and_ _Yunho_ _felt powerless._

_He felt guilty cuz he broke_ _Changmin_ _as well, he never called or gave him the time of day. Totally cut off all contact and the whole dating Go Ara, not long after their break up, it was_ _Yunho_ _fault. He knew how vulnerable and easily hurt_ _Changmin_ _is and he left_ _Changmin_ _cuz he was also hurt and rightfully so._

_But he could have accepted_ _Changmin_ _and god how he wanted too but his stupid pride and ego did not allow himself to embrace the younger male._

_"I am sorry."_ _Yunho_ _shed a tear._

_***_

_They waited for hours until they heard stumbling and curse words come from the front door and_ _Yunho_ _saw how tired manager_ _hyung_ _was and so he decided to take care of_ _Changmin_ _by himself._

_"_ _Hyung_ _open the door!" He could hear just how intoxicated the younger male is._

_He got up and open the door and_ _Changmin_ _was covered in marks, his neck and chest, probably in more places... he knew that was made by other people and he felt his blood boil._

_"Oh fuck.... I am so wasted that you look like Yun."_ _Changmin's_ _eyes showed despair._

_"It is alright_ _Changdol_ _." He pressed the male against his chest into a tight hug._

_"I am hearing him now."_ _Yunho_ _could hear_ _Changmin_ _sniffle._

_"_ _Hyung_ _, I miss him so much!"_ _Changmin_ _cried._

_"I know."_ _Yunho_ _caressed the side of the drunk male's face._

_" I'm a crook for stealing his heart away,_ _hyung,_ _I'm a crook for not caring for it and I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad person cuz I took him for granted and now he is gone."_ _Changmin_ _wanted him to be_ _Yunho_ _but he knew this was just a drunk haze._

_"He loved me, even when I couldn't love."_ _Yunho_ _wanted to say that he still loves him but_ _Changmin_ _still think that he is manager_ _hyung_ _._

_"Let's get you cleaned up minnie." He pushed back the tears and picked up the featherweight male bridal style._

_"Okay_ _hyung_ _." he did not want to fight with manager_ _hyung_ _tonight._

_Yunho_ _took him to the restroom and run a lukewarm bath, he sat_ _Changmin_ _down on the bed and he put the water to the correct temperature and he waited til the tub was filled to the right amount._

_He walked back out and saw_ _Changmin_ _look so weak and small... he wondered what happen to_ _Changmin_ _during their time apart._

_"Come on_ _Changdol_ _." He undressed him and saw him and he was thin and frail, his body littered in cuts and some look like he was abused in a very sexual manner... even his neck had fading hand prints and_ _Yunho_ _couldn't look._

_"I am sorry minnie._ _Hyung_ _failed you, I should have just accepted your apology and instead I ran away." He cried and_ _Changmin_ _wrapped his arms around_ _Yunho_ _shoulders._

_"It isn't Yun, I asked for this... I deserve this."_ _Changmin_ _was really out of it._

_Yunho_ _took him to get a bath and he made sure to not hurt_ _Changmin_ _._

_"I left you after promising you I wouldn't."_ _Yunho_ _planted a kiss on the tired males forehead._  

_"_ _Yunho_ _hyung_ _I hurt you first and I got my karma by you leaving."_ _Changmin_ _gave into his drunk haze as long as he can see the man he loves face._

_Changmin_ _took responsibility for the way he is now, it was a way to protect him from the pain and hurt of the world and it only lead to self-destruction and_ _Changmin_ _accepted the fallout as punishment ._

_"I love you still but I am tainted and disgusting Yun."_ _Changmin_ _head is spinning._

_"Never in my eyes."_ _Yunho_ _could never think badly of the young and adorable male._

_"I am so stupid!"_ _Changmin_ _started to laugh and slowly it turned into painful sobs._

_"No you aren't Minnie."_ _Yunho_ _saw_ _Changmin_ _sink into the water of the tub but caught him before he fully submerge._

_"I am talking to the ghost of lovers past."_ _Changmin_ _felt his eyes grow heavy._

_Yunho_ _allowed him to lull to sleep_. 

_He bathed_ _Changmin_ _and took care of him and made sure his scars are okay and if he is not hurt. He plans to call his personal doctor to come and check_ _Changmin_ _._

_He called_ _Donghae_ _as he is his personal doctor and friend, he only trust him to look at_ _Changmin_ _and care for him, he waited for him to arrive at the given address._  

_He grabbed clothes for_ _Changmin_ _from his closet and saw a few of his old shirts in_ _Changmin_ _closet and smiled, he grabbed a shirt and a pair of sweat pants so he would be clothed an of course boxers as well._

_***_

_After_ _Donghae_ _assessment he talked to_ _Yunho_ _and told him that half of those cuts are self afflicted and he is underweight, possibly a eating disorder..._ _Yunho_ _felt like throwing up not out of disgust,_ _Changmin_ _could never disgust him._

_"The bruises on his wrist are from rope being tied around and the marks look like it comes from a whip or so... do you think he started offering his company to old perverse men again?"_ _Donghae_ _never hated_ _Changmin_ _and always thought kindly of him cuz he made_ _Yunho_ _happy._

_"He seems to be healing well but he seems to being getting a fever so make sure if he does get one to keep him hydrated and make sure it doesn't get high. He is malnourished, it is scary and he could get worse."_ _Donghae_ _saw how distraught his best friend is and it broke his heart._

_"Thank you_ _Hae_ _. Tell_ _Hyukjae_ _sorry for the intrusion and I will send the money tomorrow."_ _Yunho_ _only looked at_ _Changmin_ _._

_"This is free dude anything for you and_ _Hyukjae_ _will understand."_ _Donghae_ _saw himself out as he wanted_ _Yunho_ _to focus on the male that lays almost lifeless on the bed._

_Yunho_ _stripped down to his boxers and grabbed one of his shirts out of_ _Changmin_ _closet and laid down next to_ _Changmin_ _on his bed._

_***_

_Changmin_ _woke up next morning with a head splitting hang over and he wanted to die. The so vivid dream of_ _Yunho_ _made him break down in tears and he felt like shit all over again. He got up from his bed and he covered in bandages and he feels the room spinning so he lays back down._  

_"_ _Hyung_ _!" He called out._

_He waited for him to come in but what he did not expect is for_ _Yunho_ _to come in with breakfast and a smile._

_Changmin_ _did not know how to react._

_"What are you doing here?" He said coldly but his eyes tell a different story._

_"_ _Hyung_ _called for me to come."_ _Yunho_ _gave him the truth._

_"Why did you come?"_ _Changmin_ _wanted to embrace_ _Yunho_ _but he knew better._

_"Cuz I care about you and last night just confirmed_ _hyung's_ _fears and now mine."_ _Yunho_ _will always worried about_ _Changmin,_ _always._

_"I am no longer your problem!"_ _Changmin_ _bites back._

_Yunho_ _did not want to argue with_ _Changmin_ _, not now._

_"Leave_ _Yunho_ _! Go back to your perfect life and to your perfect girlfriend."_ _Changmin_ _didn't want_ _Yunho_ _to leave him._

_"_ _Changmin_ _."_ _Yunho_ _tried to get the male to shut up._

_"Don't_ _Changmin_ _me, I never stopped loving you! You asshole.... you hurt me and I have no right to be mad but you treated me like a stranger, a thing of the past! You left me behind and now you want to act like prince charming, a fucking super hero!"_ _Changmin_ _is far from done._

_"I love you_ _Yunho_ _and I bared my heart and soul to you in that night in the garage and you decided to walk away!"_ _Changmin_ _sniffled._  

_"I was no longer what you wanted and I get it but you could have waited to announce the new love bird's. I always thought of you differently_ _Yunho_ _! But you are like the rest!"_ _Changmin_ _screamed._

_"_ _Changmin_ _please."_ _Yunho_ _knew he messed up._

_"Were you even in love with me?"_ _Chagmin_ _did not bother to hear_ _Yunho_ _speak._  

_Yunho_ _could not believe the_ _question_ _that came from_ _Changmin_ _mouth, that was it._

_"How dare you ask me that!_ _Changmin_ _of course I am! I fallen in love with you from the very first time our eyes met!"_ _Yunho_ _screamed._

_"It has always been you but you were so afraid and scared of letting me in_ _Changmin_ _and I understand but you let go before you even gave us a fighting chance!"_ _Yunho_ _felt oncoming tears._

_"_ _Changmin_ _, you pick a personality for free... when you feel like nobody but_ _Changmin_ _you don't have too!"_ _Yunho_ _felt his blood boil._

_"You didn't have to be anyone else or justify yourself."_ _Yunho_ _screamed._  

_"You are imperfect, perfectly the way you are and I did not want nothing more than who you are... all I wanted was the_ _Changmin_ _I have fallen so deeply in love with." Yunho accepted Changmin for everything he is and everything he isn't._

_"_ _Yunho_ _, I am broken beyond repair."_ _Changmin_ _voice came out horsed._

_"No one is broken Changmin, have never been in my eyes... you are beautiful, strong, kind, opinionated, passionate, hard working, powerful, confident, and so much more! I know some days you feel like you are nothing but I am here and you can run too me and I will protect you!" Yunho wanted Changmin to see himself the way Yunho saw  him._

_"Yunho, I was born with a void, hard to destroy with love or hope... built with a heart, broken from the start and now I die slowly_ _Yunho_ _. I am afraid!"_ _Changmin_ _broke down in tears._

_"It is okay Minnie, don't be afraid."_ _Yunho_ _brought_ _Changmin_ _into his warm and safe embrace and_ _Changmin_ _cried onto the crook of his neck._

_"I love you_ _Changmin_ _."_ _Yunho_ _kissed the top of his head._

_***Flashback ends*** _

That time was so long ago and not one of their fond memories as that time was very dark for Changmin and Yunho. 

"Please come to me before making rush conclusions Changminnie." Yunho never wanted to go back to that time of their lives ever again. 

"Promise, please promise me that you won't turn your back on me again." Changmin heart shattered to pieces that night in the parking garage. 

"I would never." He kissed Changmin's scares. 

"How did I get so lucky Yunho?" Changmin turned around to face Yunho with puffy eyes from crying.

"I found what I'd been looking for in myself and found a life worth living for someone else... I never thought that I could be, I could be happy.  Before I  was des-desperately alone until I was sent an angel from above." Changmin kissed Yunho on the lips. 

"You will never have to be alone again Changmin. I promise!" Yunho kissed him back. 

"Marry me!" Yunho smiled at Changmin confession. 

"I would not have it any other way." Yunho pulled Changmin closer. 

"I love you Yun." Changmin whispered like a prayer. 

"I love you my bambi." that night they fallen asleep happier than ever. 

**_-Fin_ **

 

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Wow, this is a lot! I am proud of myself! I usually don't write very long one shot and it is usually less than 4,000 words. I am truly stunned, regardless, I hope everyone enjoyed this story and I will be coming out with more Homin.... I don't know when but please keep watch!
> 
> Songs:   
> Handmade Heaven- Marina   
> Primadonna- Marina  
> Teen Idle- Marina  
> Shake It Out- Florence and The Machines   
> Youth- Daughter  
> One Way Ticket- One Ok Rock  
> Missing You-BTOB  
> Love Love Love- Of Monsters And Men   
> Happy- Marina
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you my lovely readers I hope you are healthy and happy. Keep it weird everyone, love you all.
> 
> -AndreaXx


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